The Pookie Guide (Joke)

WARNING: This is a few things that will make fun of "Pookies". Please do not take it seriously.

Note: My account shows demonstrations of the following advice!

One of those penguins who want to be a pookie? This guide will help you!

PART 1: The Basics

STEP 1: Like any other monster, pookies are nocturnal, so pookies tend to swarm Pet Shops at night. Make sure you come into full servers at night.

STEP 2: Now, pookies are the color of pee; Yellow. Make sure you pee all over yourself and/or rub your body with lemon juice.

STEP 3: Make sure you make a good introduction to make penguins people feel sorry for you. unoriginal entrances usually are "Gets thrown in from a car!" or "Gets hit by a truck and rolls in!" Try to be creative.

PART 2: Getting the Attention

STEP 4: Now, to get a "mumu", you need to be cute and helpless. Try to make the most disgusting things possible. That's considered "Cute" Adorable.

STEP 5: If you want more attention, get inside an invisible box and say your inside with a note attached to it saying something like "BURN ME". That's too common, so be creative!

PART 3: A good Mumu Choice

STEP 6: Some mumu's can be mean and abusive, or super kind but you don't like non-members. If the person that picks you is a non-member with no clothes, be a jerk and be sure to reject her flat out.

PART 4: Growing up!

STEP 7: Most pookies almost never grow up, but if you do, here's how. First, you need to grow hair.

STEP 8: Sometimes you need darker feathers skin, so roll around in poop or something.

PART 5: Getting Adopted

STEP 9: Once you get adopted, do the best you can to be the greatest kid around, cleaning your own dishes and doing your own chores and stuff like that.

STEP 10: Do your best to turn anything hazardous and get smothered by attention. I will put in multiple pictures for your enjoyment.

That's the pookie guide! The following will now be a simple dictionary thingy for pookies."

Fire/Microwave = Get burned in it by "accident"

Non Member Mumu's = Be a jerk to her

Contests when you have to be a color you don't have = Pretend you don't know that color

Everything that doesn't involve being good to your mumu = Cry about it